Well, it's not like I didn't get cast, I mean, I got cast. Just not as the part I wanted. Heh. Not any of the parts I wanted. I got the old man. THE OLD MAN! I can't believe that in a "Professional Theatre" I once again got cast as the old man. Something I was distinctly told would not ever happen, because they can always get a real old man instead of me. Go figure. This did make me question their need to always give me those roles, since they were effectively a waste of my education time, but that is as they say that. I'm playing the old man when they could have gotten a real one instead. Let's hear it for the bit part actor (yay).
Notwithstanding all this annoyance, I do get to understudy the lead, and that's pretty cool. Actually I think understudying the part is much harder than actually getting to play it since you need to memorize two parts and blocking and song sets and makeup designs and costume plots and fight parts (if applicable) instead of just one. So I won't have the time, nor the attention from the director to develop my character as well as the actual lead will, nor will I have sufficient stage time with the girl I'll be playing opposite (unless she's an understudy who's playing the old woman – Hah!). I was just hoping to get the part I wanted. For Once In My Life. Nope, not yet. Not not not not not not not not yet. But there is always a reason for everything, so even though I'm whining about it right now, I realize that this is what has been decided, and there's nothing I can or should do to change it, because it happened this way for a reason. I just need to do my part. And the challenge will be good for me. Challenge is good. I like challenges. Especially in acting. So I should be happy for this.
Stop whining. Aah!
LB
26 February 2007
19 February 2007
I got call-BACK!
So I might actually get the first lead of my life. Discounting villains, of course. I don't want to get my hopes up too much; they do have two other cities to audition in, and those other cities may be LA and NY. But I'm still excited. If I get any of the main characters, I'll be happy. As long as I don't get Random Townsman in the Background, I should be okay. I've gotten tired of character roles, though I think those'll get me more work. I'll give an update as soon as I know.
Of course, there's a good chance that if I do get cast, I'll have to leave my other job a little early, since they'll want me to shave as soon as Twelfth Night is over, and I can almost guarantee that this show will insist that I keep the facial hair. The fact that the separation between one show and the next is only about a month doesn't help, since I usually need a good two to grow out a good beard. Heh. It's only a few weeks... Start saving now... As long as I have enough to move in, and keep up on food, I should be just fine. But nothing more can I spend than these necessities...
Yeah...
LB
Of course, there's a good chance that if I do get cast, I'll have to leave my other job a little early, since they'll want me to shave as soon as Twelfth Night is over, and I can almost guarantee that this show will insist that I keep the facial hair. The fact that the separation between one show and the next is only about a month doesn't help, since I usually need a good two to grow out a good beard. Heh. It's only a few weeks... Start saving now... As long as I have enough to move in, and keep up on food, I should be just fine. But nothing more can I spend than these necessities...
Yeah...
LB
02 February 2007
Try reaching out.
I've actually come to the conclusion that people in general are afraid of risk. So the effort to connect isn't usually there unless there is a sufficient amount of common ground to stand upon. If you're the only one giving, then you find yourself standing on unfamiliar ground, where you can get easily knocked about. People don't like that, generally. Some live for it, sure, but they're few.
So if you have the luck of finding common ground with people, and can maintain that ground, then you're much more likely to connect with others around you. That's a good thing. Unless, of course, you are a psycho intent on ruining the lives around you while seeming like a helpless innocent bystander. Then that's bad, and you should never connect with anyone who can't at least ruin your life while you ruin theirs. But I digress.
If you stop reaching out, in my experience, you will find that few will reach out to you. So even though it's hard to connect and make friends beyond the casual, working, or school-related acquaintance, if you don't try, you will never succeed (though I will admit the possible exception of someone refusing to let you disappear into the night, as it were).
But I'm sure I'm doing something wrong, for others seem to connect just fine; they are all drawn to each other, and willingly seek each other out. I kind of feel like that doesn't happen very often, which may just be the pessimist in me. I don't know. Loneliness is an annoyingly whiny thing to write, and I'm sure it's worse to hear. So the real question is: What steps are you taking to fix this apparent problem? How does one improve the ability to reach out and connect with others? Do you find what seems to annoy others and squelch it? Do you change your belief system to mimic theirs? Do you mold yourself to fit in the whims of the society that surrounds you, participate in their humor, view their entertainment, and in all things follow their lead? It cannot be so. It goes against all I know to do any of those things. Well, turning down what annoys others may not be a bad idea, but I don't know that I'd even go very far with that, provided the things you do are not offensive in nature, but just little personality quirks. I don't mean anything serious. But stifling your modes of expression can only happen so much before you either go into depression or explode. Sometimes both.
It's easy. Sliding to try and fit in can be easy. But then it is by no means worth it, because you won't be yourself and you'll be cheating both you and your surroundings. Don't give in to that. Don't change who you are unless it's really for the better. Not for better acceptance; better life. Don't change your life unless you're improving your character. Becoming a better person. I felt I stooped a little today. Tried too hard. It's the facetious humor. Saying things you really don't mean just to be funny. Like sarcasm, but usually more ridiculous instead of biting.
Seriously though, how can you improve connection to people who stand on such different ground than you? If you can't learn that, then you're going to be alone. Unless you have that lucky ground that is common to most people, as previously mentioned. How are you going to do it?
So if you have the luck of finding common ground with people, and can maintain that ground, then you're much more likely to connect with others around you. That's a good thing. Unless, of course, you are a psycho intent on ruining the lives around you while seeming like a helpless innocent bystander. Then that's bad, and you should never connect with anyone who can't at least ruin your life while you ruin theirs. But I digress.
If you stop reaching out, in my experience, you will find that few will reach out to you. So even though it's hard to connect and make friends beyond the casual, working, or school-related acquaintance, if you don't try, you will never succeed (though I will admit the possible exception of someone refusing to let you disappear into the night, as it were).
But I'm sure I'm doing something wrong, for others seem to connect just fine; they are all drawn to each other, and willingly seek each other out. I kind of feel like that doesn't happen very often, which may just be the pessimist in me. I don't know. Loneliness is an annoyingly whiny thing to write, and I'm sure it's worse to hear. So the real question is: What steps are you taking to fix this apparent problem? How does one improve the ability to reach out and connect with others? Do you find what seems to annoy others and squelch it? Do you change your belief system to mimic theirs? Do you mold yourself to fit in the whims of the society that surrounds you, participate in their humor, view their entertainment, and in all things follow their lead? It cannot be so. It goes against all I know to do any of those things. Well, turning down what annoys others may not be a bad idea, but I don't know that I'd even go very far with that, provided the things you do are not offensive in nature, but just little personality quirks. I don't mean anything serious. But stifling your modes of expression can only happen so much before you either go into depression or explode. Sometimes both.
It's easy. Sliding to try and fit in can be easy. But then it is by no means worth it, because you won't be yourself and you'll be cheating both you and your surroundings. Don't give in to that. Don't change who you are unless it's really for the better. Not for better acceptance; better life. Don't change your life unless you're improving your character. Becoming a better person. I felt I stooped a little today. Tried too hard. It's the facetious humor. Saying things you really don't mean just to be funny. Like sarcasm, but usually more ridiculous instead of biting.
Seriously though, how can you improve connection to people who stand on such different ground than you? If you can't learn that, then you're going to be alone. Unless you have that lucky ground that is common to most people, as previously mentioned. How are you going to do it?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
